The Tyrant's Trophy
Intimacy and Lies

Maybell:

Sex was never about intimacy to Phil. That concept was never part of my husband’s vocabulary. Sex was meant to be rough; to hurt me but pleasure him. Phil took what he wanted - even when it was my first time.

I always pictured my first time as intimate; something beautiful and gentle, yet passionate. A thing that couples should show to one another but it was nothing like that. My husband was forceful and rough…I didn’t even want it. I wanted to wait until I was married but even that concept was foreign to a man like Phil. And I, like the fool, forced the bitterness away because I told myself I loved him.

Why are you so different Chad? I’m a rag so why didn’t you treat me like one?

What have I done that makes you think I’m worthy of your heart?

Nothing happened last night to my utter relief. I don’t know what came over me but smelling that female on Chad made my head malfunction. All I could think of was marking my territory…

I had never EVER, EVER kissed like that and, oh God, it felt so good. When I bit his neck, it was pure ecstasy. That was when I felt him softly push me back. At first, that annoyed me because I didn’t want space between us. I pressed up against him all the more, hoping he would just give in.

“Maybell, we can’t do this.” His voice remained steady. Not harsh like he used with the other girl, but it was enough to feel as if ice water drenched me.

“Why?” I couldn’t understand it.

“I want more than this.”

“Then why are you pushing me away?” I was giving him more - so what more did he want?

Sitting up, Chad caressed my cheek. “I respect you and want more than sex.” My eyes widened. “Maybell, I know you’re going through a lot and I don’t want to add more to what you’re going through. But I love you and I want you to love me back. Until you can, I’m not going to dishonor you by devouring you tonight.”

His reason completely stunned me. At the end of the night, he lent me a shirt and gave me his bed to sleep in, while he took the couch.

How could I sleep though? When the lust fades, guilt sat in its place. If Chad had not stopped me, I would have forced myself on him. I would have done what Phil did to me. That knowledge, along with Chad’s confession left my mind reeling throughout the night.

Chad loves me?

It was scary, yet filled me with an odd kind of hope. Romance died the day I married Phil and for years I couldn’t see the end to the darkness he brought. I always thought love and romance would never be a possibility for someone like me. Again, Chad just takes what I know and then throws it out the window, leaving me uncertain but yearning for more.

What have I done to deserve an angel like Chad? That’s what Chad is; my guardian angel. Would it be alright to want to stay with him forever? Before I knew it, the sun came up. Along with the bright rays, came a splitting headache. Chad, however, remained asleep. I could hear his breathing from the living room.

I decided to let him sleep as I got up and headed towards the bathroom. I still felt bad for forcing myself on him, so as a way to apologize, I’m going to make him breakfast.

Nature called me first so I went to the bathroom, then headed to the kitchen. I wasn’t so sure what Chad had in his fridge and pantries but hopefully, I can make something out of it. Even if it’s just bread and eggs - I can make him French toast! Somehow…even that seems like a pathetic apology after all Chad’s done for me.

There were folders on the counter by the fridge. “What’s this?” I whispered to myself. Usually, I knew better than to go through other people’s things but for some reason, I couldn’t bring myself to leave it alone. The scent of those papers drew me in, rubbing at my curiosity because they smelled like my husband.

Why didn’t I realize that last night?

Listening for any movement from Chad, I tentatively grabbed the folder. I’m sure Chad won’t mind…he and Mr. Carter have been collecting evidence of Phil abusing me. This has to be it. This could be the key to my salvation…Chad really did it. He kept his promise.

I didn’t think my heart could shatter the way it did when I read the first paper. It was my baby and in my husband’s own writing, he described what he did to her. How he cut open her little body and unashamedly harvested her organs and eyes…she was never buried either. He kept her body preserved in some glass case to study.

What made this so much worse was Chad said nothing about all this. He…I asked him over and over again…I cried into his chest all the time over this pain and he said NOTHING. He kissed my head before lying to my FACE.

Chad’s phone went off, but I didn’t even flinch. I felt…numb. I couldn’t even bring myself to panic as I closed the folder and placed it back in its original spot before opening the fridge and searching for some eggs.

“Hello?” Chad yawned into the phone. “Quinn?” I tuned him out as I got started on breakfast. I felt ‘floaty’ and unable to ground myself. I couldn’t grasp what Chad was saying when we saw each other. He took it as me being embarrassed but that wasn’t it. I felt more…broken than anything.

Only two things kept prodding at my broken brain; Why did Chad lie to me and what else was he withholding from me?

(A/N: Sorry guys, it's been FOREVER. I got busy with life and work and was feeling a bit discouraged with this story. I'm trying my best to push through but I've kind of just been in the mud with this even though I have a ton of ideas for where I want this to go. Thank you everyone for being patient with me and I hope you continue to read and like this story. God bless you and until next time.)

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