The Stars are Dying : (Nytefall: Book 1)
The Stars are Dying: Chapter 17

I told Lilith everything, though it took its toll. Exhausted by the emotions once again, I tried hard not to break down. Lilith had a calm and bright nature that I felt relaxed in, and I knew my secret would be safe with her, for when we exchanged stories I couldn’t help but see a slightly younger version of myself.

“You’re very brave,” she said sadly, helping me tie the bodice at my back.

“When we have no choice, can it really be called bravery?”

“You do have a choice,” she said.

I caught her eye in the mirror and glanced down at the ensemble, trying not to be wracked with unworthy guilt, but Lilith was insistent I wear it.

“You don’t have to do this. You could flee and hide. This is not your responsibility, but you’re carrying it on.”

“You should move kingdoms to whichever you believe to be the strongest. Convince your parents. Will you do that?”

Lilith squeezed my arm before she went over to a new assortment. “I’m not going anywhere.”

I turned to her with an insistence that she change her mind, but she smiled, holding out a deep purple cloak also styled for combat. My protest faltered in rise of my nerves as I equipped myself with it, trying not to give in to the will to shrink out of it all as wearing such a fierce outfit felt like a mockery on me.

“Are you sure your mother won’t mind?” I tried one last time as I slid into a pair of boots. There was a little extra room around my toes, but they would suffice.

“I promise,” she said.

I glanced back at the bare mannequin one last time before following Lilith out.

“It’s at least five days’ ride,” Lilith called over her shoulder, and I rushed to keep up with her giddy pace. “You’ll need to push faster than usual with less rest to get there in time.”

My race to the Central wasn’t just for that. It would all be over if Calix made it back to Alisus Keep and announced Cassia’s death first.

“In Cassia’s profile her preferred weapon is a bow,” Lilith continued. I admired her attention and help greatly. I followed her as she heaved open twin doors, and my mouth opened as we trailed inside. There were so many weapons I didn’t know where to land my gaze. “You should arrive with one at least.”

Lilith examined three bows before settling on the smallest, most decorative one I didn’t immediately take.

“She taught me, but I’m no match for her skill.”

What was I thinking—that I could possibly pull this off and be convincing in the role?

“Focus,” Lilith said.

I blinked at her assertiveness, which shed light on how flustered and sheltered I was being.

“She also had a finely tuned skill for throwing daggers.”

That was something I knew I could match her on. It had begun during my nights of boredom on Hektor’s rooftop terrace, lodging my own dagger into a wall he’d never found torn up. I can do this. The voice of confidence was small, but I had to tune out the taunts of weakness to see this through.

Lilith handed me an armguard. I’d barely fixed the strap around my forearm when a small throwing dagger was thrust at me, then another, and another, and I fumbled with them. She didn’t look back as she crossed by me, and I took a moment to slide the blades into the small holsters around my waist, then the bow onto my back.

After grabbing a quiver of arrows and stuffing a pack full of supplies, we stood in the grand reception hall of the manor. Only when I looked at the door did it hit me all at once what I was about to venture out to do.

“I wish I had a horse for you, but there’s a town only an hour on foot from here.” Lilith took my hand and pressed something into my palm. I opened my mouth to protest the coin pouch when I’d already taken so much. “This is not just for you—none of it. You’ll accept it because what you are doing is selfless. It is for you and me and everyone in this kingdom.”

My eyes burned at her hopeful passion. This stranger who longed for so much out of life that belief was all she had. It made my choice easy. For them all, I had to try.

“Thank you for everything,” I said.

We embraced, and that comfort I savored.

“I hope we get to see each other again.”

“We will,” she promised.

With that final vote of confidence, no further words were needed.

I took my first steps out. The winter air nipped my cheeks, but I breathed in deeply. There was no sure end to the path I took, and maybe all I would have was the darkness to guide me, but onward I went to seal the fate of my kingdom. In Cassia’s honor.

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