The Metropolis Series #3: Quinn and Cassandra
37. Wishful Thinking

LATER THAT NIGHT, I grabbed a few of my things and settled in at Rachael’s dorm. The last time I was in there, the Stevensons had just wrecked her room, and Bree and Harumi were helping her get it back in order. Most of Rachael’s things were put back in place, such as her bedsheets, her books, and her numerous makeup and hair care products that cluttered her desk. The only things that weren’t replaced were here rock band posters, which had left markings on the plain white walls.

I sat on Rachael’s desk and wrote a letter to Ms. Louise. I remembered saying that I wouldn’t be out long to meet Philip, but it had been hours since then. Plus, looking at the situation I was in, I didn’t think I’d be able to go back to The MacGuffin anytime soon.

Or ever at all.

In my note, I thanked her for getting me out of Paradox Road, for giving me a place to stay, and for all of those oversized shirts she’d lent me. Finally, I told her I was sorry for making her worry and that I was afraid that I would no longer be able to stay with her at The MacGuffin. I assured her that I was safely back at St. John’s, and I wished she and everyone at the café stayed safe.

After signing my name, I folded the note into a paper airplane and sent it flying through an open window. It soared straight toward the clouds, disappearing into the hazy sky.

“Those planes are amazing, aren’t they?” Rachael said.

I nodded. “Yeah. And no one has ever figured out how they worked?”

She shook her head. “It remains to be one of the biggest mysteries of Metropolis, and among the most fascinating in my opinion.”

“Yeah…” I stared at the night sky. “It definitely is.”

Rachael yawned. “Anyway, it’s getting late. I’ll get some rest now.”

“Okay.”

She tucked herself under her large fluffy comforter, which I thought was a strange thing to own in a hot and humid place like the Metropolis. Then, I noticed how she liked having the air conditioning on at full blast. My parents would kill me if I did that.

She lay down her head on her pillow and let out a sigh. “You should probably get some sleep, Quinn. It’s been one hell of a day.”

I looked out the window. “How can I sleep in a world like this? There’s so much going on.”

“Then just lie down and stare at the ceiling. It helps me sometimes. Oh, and turn off the light while you’re at it.”

I conceded to her suggestion; I figured that I could remain worried about the Metropolis’ fate while getting some rest. (It sounds contradicting, I know.) So I turned off the light and lay next to her under the covers. I stayed still as I looked at the ceiling above me, tracing the fissures on the white paint.

“Who was he to you?” Rachael whispered.

I turned my head toward her. “Who?”

“You talk about Julio like you two were friends. Were you close?”

I swallowed. I didn’t know if I had the courage to talk to Rachael about Julio. She had only learned about his death a few hours before.

“It’s a long story,” I decided to say. “I was experiencing all the dangers of the Metropolis on my own. While I pretended everything was normal in school, he was the only one I could talk to. He encouraged me to practice using my powers, even though I feared them. He came off as intimidating at first—”

Rachael chuckled. “Sounds just like him.”

“Yeah. It’s that scowl.”

“And those eyebrows.”

I laughed. “He came to me because he said I looked a lot like the monster. It was obvious that he didn’t trust me, but he grew more understanding of me the more we talked. We slowly started hanging out. He probably guessed that I was just another victim of the monster, of the Girl Beyond Bounds…”

Rachael turned to face me. “Did he ever talk about me?”

“Oh, many times. Whenever your name came up, I’d feel bad. He missed you, Rachael. A lot.”

“So he told you? You know what happened between me and him?”

Slowly, I nodded. “I do. I know everything.”

Rachael sighed. “I shouldn’t have left him like that, but I didn’t know what else to do.”

When I saw Rachael jump from the Lethe, the scene was from Julio’s perspective. When he called out to reach her, the grief in his voice resonated within me, coursing through every fiber of my being.

It would probably take a lifetime for me to forget how that felt.

“Let’s say you were given another chance to be with him,” I began. “Would you take it?”

I was afraid of her answer, but it would feel wrong if I didn’t ask.

“I’d be curious to see how things turn out,” Rachael replied. “But other than that, I probably wouldn’t. I loved him, and I’ll always will, but it was all too painful. We were both so young when it happened. We moved too fast; it was like we were destined to burn bright before going out completely.”

I closed my eyes and nodded. “Yeah. I get it.”

I thought I would feel relieved, but I didn’t. I couldn’t reverse time. I couldn’t bring Julio back. And whether or not Cassandra would win, my time in the Metropolis was running out.

“What about you?” Rachael then asked. “What would you do if you could be with him again?”

It was then I decided that for once, I was going to be honest about how I felt, no matter what the response would be.

As I opened my mouth to speak, a tear rolled down my cheek. I wiped it off and sighed.

“I hope you don’t get mad,” I began, “but I’m going to tell him how I felt about him.” I then laughed a little, masking the sadness in my voice. “Is it wrong to say that I think I’ve fallen for him?”

“No,” Rachael said. “Not at all.”

Her answer surprised me. “Wait, what?”

“Perhaps we were destined to always fall for the same people.” She chuckled. “Yes, I know that you liked Curtis, too.”

I was suddenly thrown into the hot seat. “How did you—”

“Bree explained everything to me after Curtis and I broke up, why she was so insistent about you joining the band. Besides, I already had a feeling. I saw how shy you acted around him, and I knew that he visited you in the nurse’s office often. Curtis is just nice like that—too nice.”

I cleared my throat. “I see. Yeah, I’m sorry.”

“Hey, don’t worry about it. Curtis and I are over now. And if the rumors were true, I should be mad at him for liking another girl behind my back.”

With that, the initial embarrassment went away, and I realized that it was nice to have the air cleared between me and Rachael. In a different timeline, we probably could have been good friends.

“But seriously, I don’t blame you for falling for Julio,” Rachael then said. “If things were different, and if he were still around, I’d probably cheer you on.”

I chuckled. “You’re joking.”

“Okay, fine. I’d probably just be watching from the sidelines because I’d have a difficult time facing him.”

“I figured.”

“But, Quinn—”

“Yeah?”

Her eyes drooped, and a smile formed on her lips.

“Thank you for being with him when I couldn’t…”

And with those words, Rachael slowly fell asleep.

Late into the night, my eyes remained open. My mind raced, and a sense of doom lingered over my head. Next to me, Rachael slept peacefully, making me jealous. I wanted a break from all the chaos of the world, and even sleep wasn’t given to me as a temporary escape.

Then, my thoughts shifted to how I had told Rachael about my feelings for Julio. A part of me couldn’t believe I had admitted that, while the rest wondered where the courage had come from.

I then yearned to explore the possibility. I was determined to shake off that dream Cassandra had tricked me with. I was going to make my own version, one that Cassandra had no control over.

So I got up, sat on Rachael’s desk, and tore a page from one of my composition notebooks. I placed Julio’s lighter on the table and turned on the lamp Rachael had. In the darkness, I drew a picture of myself and Julio having dinner at The MacGuffin. As my pencil glided across the paper, the events of that night played vividly in my head: the smells of food, the indistinct chatter, and the scent of Julio’s cologne. To finalize the piece, I drew a speech bubble pointing toward the drawing of myself, and in it, I wrote these words:

I like you, Julio. A lot.

And that was how it ended in my head. There was no reply. No resolution. I didn’t expect him to reciprocate my feelings for him.

I just wanted to tell him. That was all.

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