Mandy and the Tentacle Monster (Urf Oomons #1)
Mandy and the Tentacle Monster: Chapter 15

The next evening I’m sitting around the dinner table with the guys. We are still trying to understand Baht’s intentions. I mean “sitting” in the most general sense of the word. These guys don’t have legs or butts or anything. So they pretty much rest on their tentacle arms, no seat required. It’s curious that there are even chairs in the dining room. There are 4 square tables with four chairs each, and the guys kind of hanging out right in front of the chairs.

Ken is waving his tentacle arms while holding his upper arms folded against his chest. He gestures as he argues in Baht’s defense, “He has not threatened us or tried to retaliate. He paid Tiny in Crimbulonian credits, for the sake of the Void! All this after he did not even get his canvas art that he was promised. He acted with honor.”

“He also delivered these cute little drinks!” I add holding up a sealed purple bottle that is in the shape of a jug, but the size of a shot glass. A few hours after Seven had ejected Baht from our shuttle bay an unmanned drone type of shuttle had shown up. It dropped off a package near our ship and pinged us with a message:

Tiny Human,

Many thanks for your hospitality and charming company. Please accept these gifts as tribute to your singular artistic talent. Though the conduct of your shipmates was rather abrupt. Know that I was enchanted by your conversation and presence.

With fond regards from your most ardent admirer,

Baht

This was in English, I didn’t need to translate it. Baht is either a linguistic genius or has a way more comprehensive translation matrix than we do. The guys can’t even read English, much less compose a formal letter.

The package contained six tiny sealed jugs, a length of red fabric, and 3 Crimbulonian credits. The credits are the same kind of coins that I had sewn into my skirt. I tried to send Baht the canvas with spiders I had painted while he was here. But the shuttle drone was a one-off, not meant to be returned, and with no return coordinates.

“Do not ingest that!” Seven moves to snatch my bottle away, but I’m quicker and I palm it into the folds of my wrap-skirt, “It is likely poisonous.”

“Why assume it’s poisonous?” I demand, “can’t you scan it and know for sure? I agree with Ken. Baht didn’t do a single thing to make you assume the worst of him like that.”

“It is an Urglassi festival drink. By its nature, it is a poison that compromises a body’s function. It impairs cognition and causes erratic and sometimes dangerous behaviors.” As he’s explaining this, one of his tentacles is sneaking along behind me. It moves around to where I tucked the container away. I make a grab, catching the end of it and wrapping it around my wrist and palm I give a playful yank.

He colors the deepest, rosiest pink I’ve seen so far, with the faintest purple blush across his face and chest.

I’m distracted by the sparkly, shimmery prettiness of his color.  Another tentacle arm sneaks by. It pokes around, searching for the little jug. I grab that one with my other hand. I hold it tight and transfer it, squeezing it into the grip I have on the first sneaky tentacle.

“How do the Urglassi behave at these festivals?” I inquire as two more of Seven’s tentacles attempt to retrieve the jug, “Is it a big party or what?”

Ken is smiling broadly, exposing all his fangs. An orange-pink flush spreads across his cheeks and collar bones as he watches mine and Seven’s shenanigans. “They have four official festivals, the most well known being ‘The Dawning of Seesoera’. That is when spring returns to the only land mass on their planet. And when their star, Seesoera, grows larger again in their sky. Offworlders are invited to this event and it is very popular and crowded. The Urglassi share their libations and hospitality. Visitors who partake have been known to act in a very uninhibited way.”

“Uninhibited?” I ask as I attempt to tie three offending tentacles in a loose knot and hold another down with my foot. “Like do they dance and sing and talk loudly? Or are they getting naked together or something?”

“All that, yes. And many blame the drink that they serve at the festival for their untoward behavior. But these same people come back and imbibe again the following span. There seems to be no permanent effects.” Ken shake all his tentacle arms once, his version of a shrug.

“There might indeed be permanent effects.” Seven growls. He jerks his knotted tentacle arms away and then shakes them loose of each other. “Humans do not respond as intended to knock-out gas or regen goop. It would be folly to experiment with this inebriative poison.” He grabs one of my wrists and then the other while he’s speaking. Then I hold them together in front of me with one tentacle. Another tentacle starts prodding at the top part of my wrap-around skirt. That is where I have folded the topmost part over the tight knot in the fabric that’s holding my skirt together. He is still searching out where I have stashed the bottle.

“It’s just booze!” I can tell the word “booze” didn’t translate, “Alcohol! Fermented fruit juice! Humans drink all the time, it doesn’t hurt us.” I’m leaving out all the negative side effects of alcohol consumption. I’m wriggling about because Seven has pinned my hands together low in front of my belly. Warm and breathless, I’m enjoying this playful roughhousing. It reminds me of when I was placed in overcrowded foster homes with other rambunctious kids. There is definitely a playfulness to Seven that is fun and innocent. One of his clawed hands tickles around my belly, and joins into the search. A frisson of not-so-innocent excitement warms me. I have gotten used to these aliens. Their fangs and tentacles no longer startle me. And Seven’s leanly muscled physique and casual affection have definitely grown on me. I might have a full-blown crush on this tentacle monster alien.

Weird.

“There is no accounting for human behaviors.” Ken declares after swallowing a bite of noodles. “I can believe they would drink poison willingly.” He grins at me and all his tentacles do a quick bob to show that he’s playing.

The heaviness of at least two more tentacles land across my ankles and Seven pins me to my seat. Both of his clawed hands are now searching around my waist. They are brushing a pricking against the sensitized flesh of my belly and thighs. My breath is coming in short pants. One clawed finger moving toward the exact spot where I’ve hidden that bottle. I decide to distract him. Yanking both my arms up as hard as I can, I bring the restraining tentacle to my mouth and bite.

A sour, but citrusy-sweet taste bursts over my tongue. Like Sour patch candies or lemon drops. I playfully growl. But I immediately release Seven’s tentacle when I look to see that Ken and Lu are deeply shocked. Their sudden purple coloring says as much. Seven is also a shocked purple, but it’s a lighter, warmer color with happy pinks around the edges.

I guess biting is taboo. To be honest, it’s not exactly polite human behavior either.

“You started it.” I blame Seven as I shake his tentacles off.

“I did?” His bewildered face is flushing more pink than purple now.

“Yes.” My tone is authoritative. I am not apologizing for any of this awkwardness, it’s completely his fault.

“What is it that he started?” Ken interjects, “Is this a human mating behavior? You know, Hershteck’s people also bite to sexually proposition.”

“No!” My denial is vehement, shaking my head as I negate all that, “I wouldn’t. I didn’t mean that. Not to say Seven isn’t attractive, I just didn’t mean it in that way.”

“No?” Ken asks, disbelief evident.

“No.” I’m firm in my denial, but I wonder to myself if I was maybe flirting? Even if I was, I will not cop to it.

Lu moves to deposit his empty bowl in the reclamation bin. Then he uses his authoritative tone as he addresses Seven, “Tiny is no longer your pet. You cannot order her about as you would a slave. If she lives here it is as a free, sentient person. One who does not need your permission to imbibe whatever libations she wants.”

“She is delicate. Her physiology is unique and she may be harmed. She has been through traumatizing events that have had a mentally disorientating effect.” I don’t like him talking about me like this, as if I’m some broken thing, “You do not care for her as I do. I would not see her harmed.”

Huh. I do like hearing that.

“You are letting your emotions run you.” Lu has risen up to his full height and is now looking down his flat nose at Seven. “She is aware of her physiology. She is more aware than you of what she has been through and her own feelings about it. You can feel protective. But you cannot overrule her in decisions with regard to her own body and welfare.”

Aw, look at Lu respecting me and sticking up for me. What a sweetheart.

I touch Seven’s upper arm, bringing his attention back to me. “If I try the booze, I’ll let you know so you can keep an eye on me and help me to the medical bay if I have a problem.” I pat him soothingly and he colors prettily and pets my hair while combing his claws through the strands. It is nice that he worries so much about me. I’m not used to having anybody looking out for me, and Seven is so caring and dedicated. All three of these guys make me feel so, I don’t know exactly what the feeling is. But it is a warm, bundled up, and cozy kind of feeling. Like I belong with them, we are a family. They always want to hang out, never find me annoying or tiresome. They don’t demand anything from me. And even when I do something taboo or offensive, they are quick to forgive and forget about it. They chalk it up to a cultural misunderstanding. This is what unconditional acceptance feels like. Everything I ever had on Earth felt flimsy and temporary compared to this very secure feeling of belonging.

It’s a long way from the terror I felt when I first saw them. but that was only their appearance and I got used to their tentacles and fangs within the first day.

I still need to find a way back to Earth and figure out how to put a stop to all the abductions. But I don’t want to go home to live there anymore. What is there for me on earth? Loneliness and financial hardship? I want to stay here with Seven, Ken and Lu.

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