Lustful Hearts
Chapter 38: I Respect Your Heart- P2

Sam was twenty-two and was an accountant. They first met at a gay bar, which was Sam's first time, and he had been the one to make the first move. Elijah grinned wildly at that part. I think he felt a deep sense of pride that Sam was the one to choose him.

They had swapped numbers and had been texting, and after a few dates, they decided to commit to each other, but Sam had been hesitant to make it official. Unlike Elijah who was out and proud, this was Sam's first relationship with a guy.

After three months Elijah had given him an ultimatum, he was no longer willing to be his dirty little secret. So after many arguments and many tears, they were now officially a couple.

The look of excitement on his face throughout was enough to make me forget my own misery for a short time. He showed me the screensaver picture of Sam on his phone.

"Wow, cute guy," I remarked, staring at the short blonde-haired, chiselled face guy smiling back.

"I know he's kind of out of my league but he loves me," he said shrugging, putting his phone back into his pocket.

He did not just say that?

"Out of your league? Elijah you're a catch, sexy, smart and funny. You and Sam make a cute couple."

He smiled widely. "Thanks,sweetie, you're too kind. So talking about hot guys-how is Joel? Tell me all about your sexy little holiday away? Come on, I want all the details." His smile quickly turned to a frown as my face dropped at the mention of his name.

"What's wrong, Iz?" He grabbed my hand in preparation, my face displaying every emotion I was feeling.

"Joel's gone to work in Manchester to manage a bar, and I don't know when he'll be back. It could be months. He dropped the bombshell yesterday and literally left an hour later. He said he would call last night but he didn't," I trailed off, my eyes dropping down avoiding the look of pity contained in Elijah's eyes.

I had deliberately left out the Lauren part, too choked up to get the words out. I didn't want to see the confirmation in Elijah's eyes that this was bad. For now I just needed to lock that part away, to deal with it in my own way.

He reached over, taking my hand, and stroked it soothingly. "He probably got down there to a load of chaos and then thought it was too late to ring. He knew you'd be starting back at college today. I bet when you get home, he'll ring you then, or why don't you ring him? The phone works both ways." He smiled at the last part, and I rolled my eyes at him stating the obvious.

"Yeah we'll see, come on, we need to get back to class." I cut the conversation promptly, to keep my mind focused on college. It would be a welcomed change for at least a few more hours.

I rebooted my phone the moment I walked indoors. I had knocked it off earlier to save myself from checking it every five minutes. When the screen finally loaded, it revealed a missed call and voice message from Joel.

I activated the message feeling happier that he hadn't forgotten me. I knew just hearing his voice would make me feel brighter.

"Hey, Iz, errmm... I was hoping to speak to you, but you're probably at college. Sorry, I didn't ring last night but it was chaos. I didn't want to text you in case I woke you up. Hope today has gone well." He paused, and I heard a woman's voice filtering through in the background.

"Joel, the girls out front want to know when you're bringing your sexy little bum back through." He chuckled at the comment as my blood turned to ice.

What the fuck?

"Anyway, Iz, I'll try again soon, but I really am busy at the moment, so can't say when that will be-" He then became distracted by a guy's voice in the background.

"Joel, we need you man. It's getting chaotic through here. Oh sorry, didn't mean to interrupt an important phone call."

"Oh it's nothing important. I'll be straight through."

What?

Nothing important?

I gasped at his response. It was like a kick in the teeth. I'd barely got my head around his dismissive comment when he hung up.

No goodbye. I love you. Nothing.

Fucking fantastic.

I instantly deleted the message. I'd rather stick pins in my eyes than hear his hurtful words ever again. I threw my phone down hard in a rage, watching it bounce along the floor. Well if his intention was to make me feel less than special, then he'd gone the right way about it.

I guess I no longer factored in his life. I got that he was busy, trying to make a good impression. But going from being his everything to nothing within days he had officially ripped my heart out.

A million thoughts ran through my head. I grabbed and opened up my laptop, instantly clicking on Facebook. I knew I was crossing a line, officially becoming one of those people resorting to spying on their boyfriends. I felt a wave of guilt as I clicked on his profile. I had now officially become Joel's stalker.

I checked down his wall, but he hadn't made any status updates for a while. He had been recently tagged in a picture with his members of staff. I clicked on the picture to get a more magnified view.

My eyes took in the sight of Joel smiling huddled in the middle amongst them all. I gazed at him for a few moments, already missing him, but it was the sexy redhead beside him that caught my eye. She was gorgeous of course, her long, flowing wavy locks fell down to her waist. She had the whole Jessica rabbit figure going on, which in the past had always been Joel's type.

I hated her already.

She had curves in all the right places, which were now pressed up tight against my boyfriend. She looked like the cat that got the cream.

The bitch!

I instantly clicked on her name and went straight to her profile. I knew it was wrong and ignorance probably was bliss, but in this moment in time, I needed to know. I couldn't access all of it, but I could get into her photos.

Most were bikini shots of her wearing skimpy outfits on a night out. I couldn't say I was shocked, she had a great body, and she knew how to show it off. I clicked on her personal info and of course, she was single.

My heart dropped.

Fuck.

I slammed the laptop shut. I didn't want to see anymore. Joel was already making himself very welcome with the ladies, probably becoming the main attraction. He'd only been gone a day and we were drifting apart, in a few weeks we'd be dead.

With no doubt Cindy more than eager to take my place. She looked like the type of girl that got the guy, where I was the kind just too insecure to fight. First Lauren and now Cindy. I didn't think I had the strength to cling on to Joel, sometimes you just had to accept the inevitable.

I was probably just a phase, a different type of girl. In then end he'd always go back to what was familiar and I'd be left shattered, nursing a broken heart.0000☐☐☐☐☐☐☐

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