Freeing Starr
Chapter 14 ~ Bond

Zion stiffened up as if what I had just said sent a huge shock throughout his system and his eyes finally swirled with an emotion I could point out.

Shock, astonishment and for a brief second there, I thought I saw something akin to guilt.

I turned my head and refused to meet his eyes, shame washing over me as I thought of my father's hands gliding across my body.

My entire body erupted in goosebumps as my blood ran cold and my body lightly trembled. I suddenly had a strong urge to scratch my skin until I bled, to rub myself clean of my father's filth despite the many showers I've taken over the years. However, no matter how many showers I took, or how many times I rubbed my skin, the feeling of disgust and dirt never left my system.

"Sorry," I whispered brokenly, "I'm not as pure as you thought I was."

Zion said nothing and I was afraid to glance across at him and see the disgusted look across his face.

After what felt like forever but was probably only just a few minutes of silence, Zion spoke up.

"I'm sorry."

My head snapped up in surprise as my mouth slightly opened in astonishment. I stared at the man sitting across from me with wide eyes as I tried to register his words.

"What?" I asked incredulously.

Zion's lips tilted into a frown as he cleared his throat and explained further, "without knowing what you've suffered through, I went and did the same. For that, I am sorry. However, I don't regret it. As my and this pack's Luna, you have a duty to provide an heir. Consummating our bond was necessary to solidify our place as the leaders of this pack."

I glanced back down at the table and nodded, "I know. That's why I never resisted after the first time."

Zion sighed and ran a hand down his face, "I... I'll try to be gentler next time."

My face heated as I glanced across at him bashfully, "thank you."

He cleared his throat in response, "Next question."

I nodded my head and thought about it for a while before asking, "what's your ultimate goal? Your future plans for this pack?"

"I plan to become the most strongest pack on the continent."

I raised a brow in surprise, "What about the Divine Alpha Kingdom?"

Zion stated firmly, "I plan to surpass even the Alpha King."

Ambitious

I muttered mentally as my heart shook at the resolve in his eyes.

Too ambitious

I didn't want to take him seriously. Not sure that I could. A rogue pack like this could never become strong enough to surpass such a strong force as the main kingdom. Zion was being idealistic, which didn't suit his character. If it continued like this, I might just get myself mixed in with high treason. Something that had never crossed my mind before.

It was too dangerous.

"Were you a virgin when we mated?"

I blinked my eyes in surprise as my face flushed. I nodded and lowered my head in shame, "Yes. My father only took the back gates but never the front. I guess he knew that he'd one day sell me off to someone else."

"Do you regret it?"

"Regret what exactly?"

"Mating with me."

I frowned and shrugged my shoulders, "It's like you said before. I didn't have much of a choice. Although I don't agree with most the traditions within this pack and the foundation it was built on, there's nowhere else for me to go so I might as well accept it. So to answer your question, I have nothing to regret because I've never chosen anything for myself. My actions are not my own and the words I said up until now was not my own. I have nothing to regret because I've lived a life where everything was decided for me."

Zion's frown deepened, "and you accept that? Everything being decided for you?"

I smiled at him complacently, having come to terms with my life a long time ago, "If I were to tell you that I want to take control of my life and do whatever I want to do, would you allow it?"

His lips thinned into a straight line and he chose not to respond but I already knew the answer.

"Then why ask?"

"Next question," came his response.

I moved on like he wanted, aware of how tense he was and not wanting to poke at a sleeping beast.

I stared at him closely as I asked this next question. "What's behind the locked door?"

His expression remained unreadable and I watched as he opened his mouth to murmur, "nothing you need to concern yourself about."

The answer was final.

That was all I heard in his voice. He wasn't going to tell me and by the blank look on his face, he seemed to have expected this question and prepared to turn me down.

I dropped the topic and sighed, running a hand down my face, "I'm tired. I think I'll call it a day and get to bed."

I stood, picking up my plate and beginning to clean up the dishes. Dinner was clearly over. Although he didn't show it, I knew that last question soured his mood.

Zion stood from his seat, "dinner was good. We could try this another time if that's what you want... I'll go take a shower."

I smiled from over my shoulder, "Okay, I'll be up soon."

He grunted then left the kitchen. I listened to the sound of his footsteps as they disappeared up the stairs and released the heavy sigh I was holding in once his footsteps disappeared.

My body relaxed as I was finally alone. Despite wanting things to work out with Zion, I couldn't deny the fact that his presence unnerved me as much as it comforted me. I didn't know what I wanted. It was all because of this growing mate bond between us.

My fear was slowly subsiding but I doubt it would ever completely go away. Some part of me would always have this underlying fear in the back of my mind.

My mate was a dangerous man. It was best for me to stay on his good side.

I cleaned up the kitchen and dining room before heading up to the bedroom, where Zion was already stationed laying down on our bed.

I took a quick shower then came out of the bathroom with the towel wrapped tightly around me, prepared to dress myself in my nightgown.

Zion's words stopped me as I moved to enter the closet, causing a pool of dread to form at the pit of my stomach.

"Forget clothing. Come here."

I glanced back at him as I tried to calm my racing heart, mentally telling myself that this was what I had to do. As his mate and Luna, I was bound to serve him in order to bear a heir.

I took slow and steady steps towards him, my hand consciously holding the towel tighter against my shivering body.

Zion watched me through blank eyes as I approached, then reached out a hand once I was in distance and pulled me to stand between his legs as he sat at the edge of the bed.

I inhaled sharply as his hand reached for mine that held the towel tightly, unhooking my frozen fingers from their tight grasp and entwining them with his, raising his hand to press a kiss against my knuckles. The towel slid slightly to reveal the top peak of my breasts.

I exhaled the breath that was stuck in my throat as my knuckles warmed at his touch. My heart clenched and my insides shivered with, to my horror, lust.

Zion closed his eyes as he leaned his forehead against my hand, relishing in the warmth of my touch.

"This bond... it feels nice," he murmured.

I remained silent, as this was the first time Zion took the time to touch me like this... and if I were to admit it, it felt nice.

"I..." he sighed, his eyes struggling with some unknown emotion as he looked up at me, "I really am sorry. I saw you as a mere tool for me to use to solidify my position. If I had to choose, I'd have never taken you as my mate."

My heart sunk at that and despite myself, I couldn't help the bitterness that clung at the edges of my heart. Was I not good enough?

"Why?"

Zion hesitated slightly, his eyes shifting towards the door behind me before he shook his head and pulled me down until I sat on his lap.

I wrapped my arms around his neck to stabilize myself and abandoned my towel as it fell further down until it laid at my waist. Right now, I didn't feel like covering, because the predatory look that once decorated Zion's eyes hadn't made an appearance once since I entered the room. Leading me into a false sense of comfort, I knew. It was our mate bond growing stronger.

He placed a kiss on my shoulder blade, letting a silent gasp die on my lips as they parted in surprise at the tingles that gathered there.

Then he sprinkled kisses along my neck and shoulders, trailing his soft lips along until he climbed my neck and nibbled my ear, all the while whispering.

"I'll try to do better in my care for you, but you've got to get stronger in return. Your life depends on it."

Liquid heat pooled between my legs as I closed them together to rid myself of the odd sensation. My lower gut shivered as my mind reeled at his soft words that whispered into my ear. Despite the fact that he kept urging me to get stronger, I found myself slightly elated that he at least sounded like he didn't want to kill me. This I knew, was all because of the stupid bond that was starting to make its appearance.

If I listened closely, I'd still hear the slight threat in his voice and yet the bond drowned out my fear of this man as his hands began trailing across my body and leaving warmth in their wake.

I gasped as I was suddenly shifted and thrown down onto the bed, watching with slightly dazed eyes as Zion crawled over me and immediately dipped his head to suck a nipple into his mouth. My back arched on reflex as I whimpered and quickly grabbed a hold of his head, pulling him further against me.

My body felt strange.

This was the first time I've ever felt pleasure in doing vile things like this. Was it always supposed to be like this? Or was this the mate bond forcing me to enjoy this? I didn't know.

I allowed Zion to lay pleasure to my body as he sucked my nipples raw and moved his hand between my legs to cup my throbbing heat.

I was soaking wet.

Zion growled with wanton need and quickly aligned himself between my legs, wasting no time in thrusting his hips forward and pushing past my tight folds.

For the first time ever. Instead of crying out in pain, I found myself screaming in pleasure and crying for more.

Zion rocked in and out of me with a vigor like no other, his hands gripping my waist as my legs wrapped around his. Together, we rode the waves of pleasure as I succumbed to this strange yet terrifyingly amazing feeling the mate bond birthed.

Pressure built up inside of me as I prepared myself for a relief I never knew I wanted, Zion roaring his pleasure above me as his body shivered and he came undone, spraying his hot seed into my heat as I also came with a sensual moan.

We collapsed in each other's arms, satiated and spent.

My heart trembled slightly with hope. Hope for change. Hope for a better future. Hope for Zion's love.

If only things were that easy.

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