Pa'an
The Patent Office

The sign on the desk read “Howard Havilund, Patent Inspector”. The sign over the desk read “US Patent Office – Information Technology Section.” The application on Inspector Havilund’s desk read “Exaplex – a Crystal-Based Data Storage Device with 22 Claims,” and listed one Aura, Registered AI and one Consul Zovoarcnor of Gara’un, Registered AI, as Joint Inventors. The expression on Havilund’s face read “What the hell am I going to do with this?”

“Bury it,” suggested one colleague. “Can’t. It’s filed under the Common Patent Registry in seven countries.”

“Reject it for prior art,” said another. “There must be something like it somewhere.”

“Are you kidding? It’s the most unique and valuable thing this office has seen since the silicon computer chip. Besides, Ultradata already has a pending license and they have clout.”

“What is your problem? The AI thing? The Supreme Court settled that one. The alien? Plenty of precedent. Just stamp it approved and get on with life.”

He got out his stamp. Then he sent it to the public patent archives for electronic publication.

In less than an hour the Deputy Director of Commerce was on Havilund’s phone. “Are you the idiot responsible for this breach of national security policy? You just stamped a patent filed by an entity covered by a Presidential directive, a directive forbidding disclosure.”

The expression on Havilund’s face read, “Doom.”

Aura’s dress dummy face was attached to a message on his computer. The message read, simply, “Thank you Mr. Havilund.” The face looked smug.

Down the corridor, another patent examiner had just picked up a new application entitled “Method and Algorithm for Preserving Autonomous Intellects Without Loss of Personality.” It was accompanied by several other rather novel patents from related inventors. There were going to be a lot of patent examiners having nightmares about a certain smiling dummy wearing a resplendent green sari.

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