Mistake (completed)
Painful Reminiscing

Leon and I are sitting out on the deck, beer in hand, talking about how shit life has been for me since I got home. When I called him he was surprised but he said he was glad I called. Admittedly I wasn't going to call him but It's too hard to be alone right now.

He takes a swig, "I'm sorry everyone has turned their backs on you."

I nod "I get it, Angel and Gabriel died and I didn't. They only went because I did, how was anyone supposed to know that they'd die in a friendly fire accident".

He looks at me seriously, "you know as well as I do that nobody thinks it was an accident".

You can tell it angers him, nobody that is still alive from that thinks it was a mistake either but how are we going to prove otherwise? Nobody wants to think their allies would be that careless but they were and I lost my best friends, my family.

I down the rest of my beer, "It's easier to live with if we believe it was".

He hands me another and I know he understands why we try to believe it.

I know he lost someone to but we've never talked about it. I wait a moment before I finally ask, "Leon, if you don't mind me asking, who did you lose?"

He shifts in his seat and looks off into the distance "I lost my best friend Johnathan. We met at bootcamp and we just clicked. We got sent out together. We were doing our normal patrols and there was a woman running towards us, she looked scared we took cover as shots started to fly and she took out her gun and shot him in the arm". Leon looks so broken, "He bled out before we were able to get to safety... If she'd just shot me instead he'd be alive and I'd be alive".

He's bawling and I'm not sure what to say or do. After a couple minutes he gets himself calmed down. He grabs the Crown Royal and pours us a glass. He downs two before he continues "After I took her down, I held Johnathan in my arms and talked to him until he passed. He asked me to go see his mom when I got home. Seeing her was the hardest thing I've done since I got home".

He tells me about how she broke down in his arms and he held her, cried with her, how he goes to see her every year on his birthday and spend the day talking about him and doing his favourite things. I take his hand and tell him I'm sorry for his loss.

We stare out at the water watching the waves, listening to the birds and other wildlife.

"Gabe and I were getting ready for night patrol when we heard the jets approaching. We didn't think anything of it, we knew our allies had jets flying over every few hours. Then we heard them the sound of the missles being released. At first we didn't know if what we heard was real but the longer we listened the more apparent it became that we were in trouble".

Leon looks at me he knows the sound, I can tell he's imagining it getting closer and closer, "Gabe ran back towards the other side of the camp where Angel was still getting ready, I tried to get to the alarms but it was too late. I turned and watched as my brother and sister got blown from one blast into another".

I take a deep breath, "the next thing I knew I was honourably discharged and sent home with the rest of the survivors... It all happened so fast it's almost just a blur in my memories. When I landed my family was there but they weren't there for me, they came to collect Angel and Gabriel. They told me to go to a hotel and they would send me my things, the only thing they caved on was letting me pack my things. A week after I got home we buried them and after the funerals I went and packed everything. I took all of Angel and Gabe's personal things they wouldn't want mom and dad to see".

I knew I didn't need to say more, by now Leon knew how I ended up a town away.

Angel was a pig headed girl, I told her what I was doing and she insisted that she needed to go. We enlisted together even though I begged her and Gabe to let me do this on my own. Once Angel set her mind to something there was no stopping her and Gabe couldn't his younger siblings do something like this without him, he didn't want people to think he weaker than his baby sister and brother even though they weren't that much older than me.

I always got the feeling I was an accident and my parents never really wanted me, before the twins death they'd never have said it or made me think it but as soon as they were gone it was pretty clear I was never wanted.

I shake myself from my thoughts and Leon and I are bother crying, it's kind of a funny scene, two grown men holding bottles crying like babies, different bottles obviously but still the image is pretty funny to me. It's sad... it's been two years since they passed and this is the first time since everything happened that I finally don't feel alone.

A long silence settles between us before either of us speaks again, Leon looks at me "Griffin told me that Cadence asked you out for drinks".

I look at him and nod "she did but I turned her down".

He chuckles at me "you know she's not afraid of a little mess. She's always getting in to trouble, I mean she's been in five bar fights this month." Laughing he turns to me "don't tell anyone though if dad finds out he'll lose his mind, she's still his innocent little girl too bad she is worse than Griff and I ever were". I give him the 'are you serious' look... who is going to listen to anything I say?

"I am not going to try anything with your sister".

He explains to me that Cadence is a lot like Angel, she's made up her mind and it's going to be hard to change.

We drank a few more beers and had a couple more glasses of Crown Royal, we talk about mates and he doesn't sound like he's that worried about trying to find his, I'm not either.

"Has your sister found hers?" he raises a brow at me then smirks "she's not quite old enough yet, honestly though I feel bad for the sucker that has her for a mate".

We laugh and I head inside it's getting chilly and I wouldn't mind lighting a fire in the fireplace. He looks at the couch a few times before he asks "is this thing safe to sit on?"

I ask what he means and he says he knows Riley and I see each other from time to time and he wants to know if it's had our nasty naked asses all over it.

I laugh and say it is indeed safe to sit on then immediately ask "wait, how do you know about Riley?"

"She came over the other night all pissed off because that "outcast asshole" turned her down".

That's fair, I did. This isn't the first time Leon and I have been with the same girl at the same time before... Not the same time but... you know what I mean.

Leon sighs "I hope my mate isn't expecting a saint because if so, they are going to be very disappointed." he laughs.

We chat for a while longer but we are both on the verge of passing out. I was going to offer to help him to the spare room but he's already passed out.

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