Hell Off-World
Boss Battle

Three of the planet’s moons shone down over the city as the Comet make its approach. It became apparent that the crew had three immediate concerns. The first was the gargantuan surrogate, still towering over the city, with its tentacles flailing, blotting out the starlight behind it, the second, was the Reaper, circling defensively overhead, finally, the RG Wyvern had landed immediately outside the spire.

“Amy!” Atlas cried anxiously, upon making the third discovery.

Theresa quickly evaluated the situation. “Okay Atlas, two questions- how high can you jump out of the ship from, and how do you feel about using one of these?” She held out one of the pistols Atlas had armed with crystal bullets.”

“Doesn’t matter, and fine.” Atlas took the gun and quickly left the cockpit, without waiting for instruction. It wasn’t that Atlas was recklessly loyal to Amy, it truly didn’t matter how high they were, with a clear view and stable ground, Atlas' smart suspension enabled them to drop from any height without danger.

“Okay, Blaine, take the other gun and get in the Tank, you’re gonna keep the Reaper busy while we take out the big guy. Let’s hope Atlas’ laser modification does the trick.”

Blaine left the cockpit and Theresa took his place. She turned to face Monty.

“You ready to kill an immortal world-destroyer, Monty?” She said, with a hint of nervousness in her voice.

Monty turned to her and smiled, his smile said he was nervous, terrified and exasperated, but certainly not happy. The Tank rocketed from the hangar and made a beeline for the approaching Reaper, which had just spat a fireball which Theresa rolled the ship to dodge, she swung the Comet down to ground level and shot past the spire, knowing Atlas was ready to leap from the ship when she did.

The ship pulled up and began to circle the city, in the corner of the windscreen, the pilots saw the Tank rocket into the Reaper like a bullet, sending it wobbling downwards slightly. The Tank dropped like a stone, before re-engaging thrusters and flying away from the winged cephalopod. The Reaper immediately took the bait and flew after it, leaving the Comet to face off against the monstrous Destroyer surrogate, which had now turned to face the site of the battle, and was beginning to advance.

Without stopping to overthink, Theresa put the thrusters to maximum and rocketed towards their towering adversary. As its gaping mouth ignited with an inferno of blue, she seized the weapon system’s joystick and unleashed a maelstrom of laser fire at the surrogate. With no time to see if she had wounded the creature, Theresa rolled the ship left to dodge the boulder of fire that had been launched in her direction.

As she orbited the creature from a distance, she saw it exhibiting no sign of pain. It stood proudly, like some ominous totem pole, with smoke spewing from the mandibles surrounding its mouth, like an active volcano. She ducked under one of the monster’s wings as they waved slowly in their direction.

“Captain, look!” Monty pointed.

At the base of the creature, on the side the Comet had approached from, a number of tentacles, like mighty tree trunks, had landed on the ground and were writhing like fish out of water. A grin spread across Theresa’s face, and long overdue hope started to well within her.

“It’s working!” She almost screamed.

Granted, they hadn’t tried attacking the surrogate before, but Theresa doubted the squid people would have had so much trouble if it could be wounded by the meagre asteroid laser on the Comet.

“Okay Monty, how do you feel about earning yourself the biggest hunting trophy in the universe?” Theresa joked. “I’ll fly us around it, you keep that trigger held down. We’ll tear this thing apart, one tentacle at a time!”

Meanwhile, Blaine’s heart was racing. The Tank didn’t have any crystal powered weapons, and he doubted that his tiny bullets would phase such a large creature, but he was determined to eliminate it without hindering his team, anyway. The Tank soared along the city’s streets, barely a few feet off the ground, while the Reaper soared behind him, sending great chunks of buildings flying in the process.

Manipulating the Tank like not even his mother could, Blaine had it seize one of the long, rusted land vehicles as it passed, and flip over onto its feet. The Reaper continued to fly towards him, and he thrust the vehicle like a lance. Although Blaine’s makeshift weapon took its fair share of damage too, a considerable number of tentacles fell to the floor, most of them mushed beyond recognition.

Far from debilitated, the creature wrapped a dozen of its remaining tentacles around the Tank and, with a flap of its wings that created an explosion of debris around them, launched them both into the air. Blaine flipped every switch on his console that was even remotely related to weaponry. The Tank launched missiles, burnt with lasers and released an electrical charge which could have killed a small town, but the monster didn’t relent. Once they were at a dizzying height, the tentacles that surrounded the monster’s mouth parted and a blue glow met Blaine’s gaze.

Fire erupted across the Tank’s windshield and, on the display, Blaine saw the shield integrity drop like a stone. The cockpit would be full of fire in less than three seconds. It was lucky that Constantines were good under pressure. Without a second thought, Blaine slammed his hand on the overhead button labelled “DETONATE”.

With a hiss of compressed air escaping, the roof flew off the Tank and the seat Blaine was sitting in followed its example. Looking down, Blaine saw his beloved exosuit explode violently. The Reaper recoiled, falling backwards through the air and missing almost a quarter of its body, but still flapping its wings steadily. While he was still rising, Blaine cut through his seatbelt with his waist-mounted knife. The chair had a built-in parachute, but in his current position, it seemed like it would do more harm than good. He rose steadily on his own momentum, then felt his stomach do somersaults as gravity claimed him back.

While Blaine began to fall, he looked at the mutilated Reaper flying towards him. He knew nothing of squid person anatomy, of course, but some things were constant across the universe, and if there was one part of the monster’s grotesquely exposed interior he recognized, it was part of the Reaper’s brain. Blaine drew his pistol and prayed his training wouldn’t be for nothing.

BANG. Click. BANG. Click. BANG.

Although all three bullets had clearly penetrated the monster’s head, Blaine could only say with certainty that one of them had torn through the monster’s brain, either way, it had clearly flapped its last flap. As the pair of them fell, Blaine followed through with the not-falling-to-his-death part of the plan. He pulled his grappling hook from his belt and fired. Having pulled a different trigger to last time, the drone immediately deployed into a hook and launched directly forwards on its propulsors, impaling the monstrous carcass. With a whir of the harness on Blaine’s belt, he soared towards his victim and, after drawing a deep breath and holding it, he flew into the folds of its torn flesh and they fell towards the planet together.

Both the G-force and the anxiety had Blaine’s stomach in knots as they plummeted, but within seconds, the cluster of tentacles and guts splatted into the street below like a morbid cake, covering several buildings in purple-red blood. Blaine slowly rose from the gore, covered head to toe in blood and viscera, nauseous and rattled, but unharmed.

Overhead, the Comet was still circling the Destroyer. Half a dozen fireballs had been launched at the ship, but the colossal monster simply wasn’t fast enough. Just when the two pilots were thinking the creature was all intimidation and no brain, the ship shuddered and refused to move anymore. Looking across the various displays in a panic, Theresa and Monty saw that a tentacle had snuck around from behind the creature, and had grabbed onto the ship by one of the side guns, Monty immediately open fired on the tentacle with the gun it was holding, but in doing so, they received confirmation that lasers without the crystal lens were utterly ineffective.

Monty focused on the tentacle with the ship’s crystal laser, but the angle only allowed him to aim for the root, which meant blasting three more tentacles aside first, by which point the ship was ensnared at multiple points. The destroyer turned slowly, to face its prey, and the five grotesque mandibles surrounding its mouth opened wide. Theresa and Monty stared in awe as they witness a tiny blue spark in front of the ship, turn into a sphere of blue fire which begun to expand.

“GIVE IT HELL!” Theresa screamed, and Monty was all too happy to oblige.

The ship’s laser unleashed a hail of fire directly at the expanding fireball and the effect was immediate. Like a burst water balloon, the fireball lost its shape and spread around the monster’s mouth, washing over the Comet’s windshield in the process, and the Destroyer let out an ear-shattering howl and doubled over backwards. Monty continued his assault, firing all over the mouth and then targeting the mandibles.

Theresa almost thought that the monster might be defeated, but it turned out they weren’t so lucky. Still holding the ship tightly, the surrogate spun the ship upside-down, so the laser pointed away from it. Monty was securely strapped into his seat, but Theresa, who had taken over in a hurry, fell to the ceiling. Monty continued firing, undeterred, by turning the laser around, but the monster instinctively pushed against the gun with a tentacle and, with a heartbreaking snap, their weapon flew from the top of the ship and spiraled to the ground.

“Captain!?” Monty signed in desperation, his hope deflating like balloon.

Theresa stood up on the ship’s ceiling and frowned with determination. “Stay sharp and get ready to fly when it lets go.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Something unbelievably idiotic.” She replied.

Theresa raced through the upside-down ship, finding it challenging to navigate, especially since the monster holding it periodically tipped it left and right. Eventually, Theresa opened a cabinet by banging her fist against it, and four helmets with tiny metal cylinders hanging from them tumbled out. Theresa picked one up and put it on her head, it hissed as it formed an airtight seal around her neck, and air from the cylinders decompressed and pumped into the helmet. All the while, Theresa kept running through the ship, until she arrived at the conference room, and leapt up to the maintenance hatch in the floor.

As Theresa climbed unsteadily out of the Black Comet and onto its skywards-facing belly, she came face to face the monster that had it in its clutches. Or rather, she would have, if it had a face. Based on its colossal size, its brain would have to be the size of a truck. Easily small enough to be endangered by her crystal knife. Before leaping into action, Theresa couldn’t help but smirk as she remembered a time when she was twenty, and Blaine’s father had been swallowed by a sand whale, and she had reacted in a very similar way to how she was about to act, and while sand whales were barely half the size of the Destroyer, it was reassuring to remember that it had worked like a charm.

Theresa charged forwards and launched her grapple into the highest tentacle she had a clear shot at. While Monty watched in open-mouthed awe, Theresa shot from the Comet and, by disengaging with careful timing, soared over her grapple point and into the tentacled equivalent of the Destroyer’s scalp. As predicted, the tentacles all around her reacted to her presence. Unlike on its sides, the tentacles on top of the monster’s head were just a few inches in diameter, easy prey for her blade, but she was horrifically outnumbered.

One tentacle after another attempted to ensnare her arms, but Theresa moved like a blur, mowing them down like grass. At one point, the Destroyer showed impressive dexterity by seizing Theresa’s ankle with the end of a tentacle and then hoisting her off her feet and into the air, dropping the knife in surprise in the process.

As she looked in a panic at the tentacles looming in around her, Theresa wasn’t sure what she had on her person that could set her free. Luckily, she wasn’t alone. A series of laser bolts blasted against the tentacle from one of the Comet’s remaining turrets, and it dropped Theresa to the monster’s head. Before she could be reclaimed, Theresa leapt to the knife, which had begun sliding down the slope of the Destroyer’s head, and took it in her hand, holding it more firmly this time.

She charged forwards, through the path where the tentacles were thinnest, thanks to her recent rampage, and plunged her knife into the boneless skin beneath her. The Destroyer howled and threw its head back and forth. As she hung onto the handle of the knife, for dear life, Theresa heard the Comet’s engines roar into life as the tentacles flailed desperately in all directions, setting it free. Theresa slashed and slashed in the same place, attempting to penetrate the colossal surrogate’s proportionately-sized skin. All the while, the stumps of tentacles pushed against her feebly, and the surrounding ones pointed ominously in her direction, unable to reach her, or else she would have cut them down already.

Theresa was far from being a doctor, but she was fairly certain she recognized spongy, oozing grey matter when she had made a hole big enough in the leviathan’s head and, in what was easily her goriest act of barbarism to date, Theresa shoved her entire upper body into its brain and begun hacking chunk after chunk free with her knife. Aided by her helmet, providing her with air, Theresa was almost swallowed entirely by the disgusting brain, before she could feel herself beginning to fall.

There could be no more doubt that the colossal monster was no longer supporting its own weight, as Theresa felt herself grow lighter as the monster’s head flew downwards. Theresa considered the same thing her son had, in using her prey to cushion her fall, but she didn’t want to be crushed by cascading brain, as she pulled her head out of the Destroyer’s though, she realized she didn’t have to.

“Captain! Grapple onto the ship!”

Monty had perfectly re-stabilized the ship after being let go of, upside-down, and had spun around loyally, to collect his captain. Theresa grinned and leapt from the plummeting carcass, firing her grapple onto the underside of the ship in the progress. Beneath her, the ground shook as the monster collapsed, face first, sending several small buildings flying.

Hanging onto her cable with one hand and grinning proudly, Theresa pressed the comm button on the side of the helmet.

“Blaine, what’s going on?” She spun around slowly, but realized she couldn’t see the Tank or the Reaper.

“I’m fine.” Blaine’s voice was ragged and weary, but he didn’t sound hurt. Theresa breathed a sigh of relief. “I took out the Reaper, thought it was pretty impressive until I saw that giant thing fall flat on its face. Guess it’ll be a while before I inherit the Comet, hey?”

Theresa laughed, before she sent her reply. “Absolutely! Now come and meet us at the Spire, Atlas might need our help. And Monty, I think we might need our other secret weapon sooner rather than later.

-x-x-x-

As the Comet swept over the Spire, Atlas leapt from the loading ramp and rolled like a ball across the ground, standing upright effortlessly, having sustained no damage. In one hand, they held the pistol, with six Reaper-killing bullets, in the other, their electro-telepathic transmitting and receiving device, they jammed it into the ground where they stood and continued into the spire, Atlas could tell Amy was close, and seconds later, they saw her.

The muscular vampire Reaper stood proudly in the center of the room, surrounded by the inactive portals. Her arm was held above her head, and the front of Amy’s jacket was clutched in her fist. Atlas immediately lifted the gun and pointed it directly at the Reaper’s forehead.

“You’re going to want to let her go.” Atlas warned.

Of course, Atlas was almost certain that the Reaper couldn’t be reasoned with, but, with perfect reflexes, a vampire of her build would be able to move Amy into the path of the bullet in the time it took Atlas to squeeze the trigger, and Atlas wasn’t about to take a chance on Amy being bulletproof, while being held by a very corporeal Reaper.

“Atlas! You’re… wait, what’s with that gun!?” She asked, incredulously, she was understandably frustrated to know that an old trinket of Blaine’s was to be her only salvation.

“It’s a Reaper killer, Amy, trust me.”

“I do trust you, Atlas.” Amy breathlessly reassured them. “Now do me a favour and save my life, please.”

The Reaper didn’t relent, nor did she react at all, she stared at Atlas, as if sizing them up. Atlas ran various simulations of their options. The Reaper wanted to kill Amy, more specifically, shower her blood upon the egg, that didn’t necessarily keep her from killing Amy where she stood, but that would put her at a tactical disadvantage, Atlas readjusted their aim slightly.

“Amy, get ready to run.” Atlas instructed.

The Reaper didn’t realize why Atlas wasn’t aiming at her anymore, and wouldn’t figure it out until after Atlas pulled the trigger. The bullet ricocheted off three of the spire’s metallic surfaces, before imbedding itself in the shoulder with which she was holding up Amy. The monster shrieked in pain (something ordinary vampires were unable to do) and dropped Amy, who ran over to her robotic companion.

“Thanks Atlas, so what’s the plan?” She asked, excitedly.

“Well, you can’t touch anything, so how about I kill this Reaper, and you watch?”

Amy nodded quickly. “Okay, sounds good.”

Atlas retrained the gun on the Reapers head and didn’t hesitate in firing a second time, but without her hostage, the Reaper wasn’t hesitating either. She spat a small ball of fire at Atlas, sending the gun spinning out of their hand, just after it fired its second shot, which whizzed past the Reaper’s ear. The mutant vampire lunged, and Atlas had witnessed enough combat second hand, to know to do the same, rather than go for their weapon.

Atlas had the superior speed, and landed a devastating punch against their opponent, sending her sliding backwards on her feet, but not so far that she couldn’t retaliate. She thrust forwards with her knee, and although Atlas had time to jump backwards, lessening the blow, they still ended up with a hefty dent in their chest plate. The pair continued trading blows, while their speed and strength were incompatible for either to finish the other off quickly.

Amy watched helplessly, unsure how she could help her friend. She looked over to the gun Atlas had dropped. It was smoking slightly, but seemed intact, she knelt by it and, remembering how she had budged a pebble when she first discovered her new condition, and optimistically moved her hand towards it, but phased through it without effect.

She sighed as she looked up and saw her best friend, fighting for their life to protect her, and keep the Reaper from carrying out its gory ritual on her. Amy frowned, and suddenly, she knew exactly how she could help Atlas.

“Hey! Scary vampire lady!” Amy jumped up and down and waved her arms. The vampire had taken hold of Atlas’ neck and was preparing a punch that could decapitate them, when she stopped and looked up. “I’m gonna take a raincheck on the sacrifice, okay? Bye forever!” And with that, she turned and sprinted into the city.

The effect was instantaneous, the Reaper dropped Atlas without a second thought and charged from the Spire after her. Atlas bounced back up to their feet and sprinted in pursuit, scooping the gun off the ground as they went. Ahead of them, Amy had run down an alleyway. She had already bought Atlas the brief window they needed to grab the gun, but she didn’t know how she would escape the vampire. She quickly discovered that her propulsion boots wouldn't work, probably because she was incorporeal when she wasn't in contact with a Reaper.

She was incorporeal… The thought repeated herself in Amy’s head and she was left with the impression that she was very stupid.

As the vampire appeared at the end of the alleyway, Amy dived through the nearest wall and into the house on the other side. Unfortunately, the wall barely slowed her pursuer down any more than thin air, so Amy ran on, she twisted and turned each time she passed through a wall, in the hopes of shaking off the Reaper vampire, but it was as though she could sense her (which it seemed perfectly likely, she could). Amy ran desperately in a wide arc, trying not to get too far away from the spire, so as not to lose Atlas, she also remembered that she could fade away if she spent too long in this dimension, but no matter how hard she ran, the sound of collapsing building was never far behind her.

Amy began to tire. Despite her relentless activity for the past hour or so, Amy felt like she shouldn’t be as drained as she should be, and she was beginning to feel cold. She had a nagging feeling that she should go back through the portal immediately.

As Amy ran across the open ground immediately outside the spire, she began to breathe heavily. Looking over her shoulder, she saw the vampire striding towards her. She was covered in rubble and blood from her bullet wound was staining her jacket. Amy ran, feeling like a wounded deer, as the hunter approached, gaining on her without even breaking into a jog.

The vampire was just about to grab Amy by the neck, when she looked up and darted to one side, as the third bullet narrowly missed her head, and she leapt back before a fourth hit her in the chest.

“Atlas! How many of those do you have!?” Amy criticized, as Atlas ran over to her defensively, with their weapon trained on the Reaper.

“Two more, and I think the kids call what I just did ‘suppressing fire’, and you’re welcome.”

“Th… thank you.” Amy coughed, weakly.

“You okay?”

“I need to get back through the portal…”

Before the two could plan further, the vampire’s jaw grotesquely unhinged, and before Atlas could reload and take aim again, she unleashed a stream of purple fire across the ground between herself and her prey, which towered into the air, as it had for the Lazorians. Clearly, she wanted Amy alive. Atlas poised themself anxiously. They were unable to sense their adversary with the fire overloading their sensors.

With no warning, the vampire lunged through the flames and grabbed Atlas’ gun by the barrel. Atlas fired the penultimate bullet, but, even with a hole in her hand, the vampire twisted the end of the gun like a drinking straw. Sensing what was about to happen, Atlas ejected the final bullet, before the gun was snatched away from them and thrown through the raging flames and out of sight.

The vampire attacked further by putting all of her weight into a right hook with her intact hand, and Atlas only had time to turn defensively, blocking with their upper arm. Atlas’ anatomy failed them and they flew across the ground, the arm they had blocked with detached upon impact, with a shower of sparks and they lay still.

“Atlas!” Amy cried out.

The vampire, whose facial expression made it clear they were done playing games, grabbed Amy by the arm and began dragging her towards the egg which hungered for her blood. Amy was only mildly aware that the Comet had landed nearby during the fight. She hoped the rest of the crew had a more guaranteed plan to take the vampire down.

When the vampire entered the hole in the side of the massive building though, she saw that the games were just beginning. For the first time since Amy had flown through one with a flesh wound, the portals were shimmering, and the flesh that made them, red and full of life. Theresa and Monty stood proudly in front of them, showing appropriate smugness for a couple of people who had just miraculously repaired a tear in the fabric of existence.

Evidentially, Reapers were capable of being stunned by surprise, as it seemed the lightning-quick reflexes she had displayed, when fighting Atlas, had dulled slightly, when Blaine stepped out from his hiding place, next to the hole in the wall, pointed his gun at her head and announced, “Surprise!”

BANG!

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